self-centered.
fly.
change.
fear.
hatred.
silence.
suppressed.
baileys.
deadlines.
pawn.
fool.
gullible.
laughter.
happiness.
tears.
hide.
thankful for the lovely boy.
for helping me understand myself more.
i guess as i grow older, i appear to be more oblivious but deep down, it’s going the other way round.
i’m just running away.
i fear.
sometimes i guess i’m secretly jealous of people.
to the extent of being bitter.
that is why i guess i hate people not feeling satisfied with what they have, because i don’t even have what you have, that simple thing. very simple.
but i guess people are never satisfied. even if i’m the most blissful person now, i would probably still be unsatisfied.
i don’t even need god damn money to be happy. i don’t even need a goal to be happy.
i’m happy in some ways. some.
maybe i’m not putting in enough effort to make things work.
because it never works.
not without any sacrifices.
and not a sacrifice which i wish to make.
maybe you think i should stop complaining about life.
maybe i really should.
or maybe i’m just being a little bit more honest than you.
or maybe you don’t even know me, do you?
i just don’t have the guts to be happy.